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Psychological Jujutsu: Are You A Mind Reader?

6/5/2014

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By James Santagata
Principal Consultant, SiliconEdge

"So, what, you think you're a minder read and can read minds, right?! Ha!"

I often find myself fielding this question although sometimes it's delivered in a tone of voice that conjures up images of an accusation such as "charlatan!" rather than a genuine question.

But that's okay, as it shows interest and engagement on the person asking it and once they allow me to explore a little more with them, they are usually hooked and have an "aha!" moment.

....

So the simple and honest answer to this question or perhaps the rejoinder to this accusation is, of course, I'm not a mind reader nor do I purport to be. And yet my results are there and they are what they are with them being more often than not extremely uncanny in their accuracy. 

The most important insight from my work and research that I try to impart to my students, clients and skeptics is that you don't need to be a mind reader to be accurate in your reading of a situation because in most cases the party in question through their actions, reactions and inactions almost to a tee loudly and graphically telegraphs exactly what they are thinking and how they are thinking as well as their intentions.

....
[more] Are You A Mind reader? >>
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Fierce & Ferocious Office Politics... Isn't It Time The "Good Guys" Won?

5/9/2014

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By James Santagata
Principal Consultant, Career OverDrive!


Fierce & Ferocious Office Politics...Isn't it time the "good guys" won?

Sometimes the best defense not to throw in the towel or yield but to mount a napalm-laden offense.

Yielding and deciding to quit and find a new position in the face of fierce office politics simply kicks the can down the road, effectively mortgaging your future with the payments coming due when you can least afford them. 

Trust me on this.

This can be solved with the right attitude and training, very quickly. Did you know that in most of these cases, the dirty politicker is standing on a woobly chair, amongst a greased floor with a rope around his or her neck? 

You simply need to distract them so that they lose their balance and do themselves in...or....surface the "opportunity" to another aggrieved party who has no compunction in "bumping" the chair.

Psychological Jujutsu™ >>
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Liberal Arts Degree Got You Down? Here's The Truth About The Liberal Arts Degree

2/13/2014

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By James Santagata
Principal Consultant, Career OverDrive!


There's been a lot of talk and debate over the last few years as to the value of the "'lowly" Liberal Arts degree. 

A variety of pundits and talking heads have even gone so far as to argue that there's no value to be had in such a degree, especially when one factors in the direct costs incurred during the course of earning the degree as well as the opportunity costs associated with the four years unemployment typically experienced while the student studies for the degree.

To all of these pundits and all of this punditry I have but one word: 

Hogwash!

I'm here to tell you that Liberal Arts degree, in and of itself, is most likely fine. 

Just fine.

"What? James, are you serious or just totally delusional?! "

Yes, I'm serious and no, I'm not delusional. 

There are many reasons why I am certain that the Liberal Arts degree is not a "Death Wish For Careers" which I won't go into at this time, however, it is readily apparent ot me that plenty of value can be extracted from both the pursuit and earning of a Liberal Arts degree. In turn, this acquired and derive value can be used to great positive effect during a Liberal Arts degree-holder's pursuit of  professional employment.

And as an aside, plenty of value can also be extracted and shown to a prospective employer by even non-degree holding job seekers/job applicants as well.

Here's The Real Deal In A Nutshell:
 The Liberal Arts degree itself is fine, provided that you have studied and learned your subject matter to some basic level of competency but more importantly learned HOW to study when acquiring new information in the future and without direction or prodding from your professor or other authority figure.

Now, reports have come back from many if not most Liberal Arts grads saying how tough a time they face looking for meaningful (versus underemployment or unemployment) employment after having graduated.

There is no doubt that with few exceptions Liberal Arts grads have it harder, but what they face is by no means insurmountable, it's more about filling in a few gaps, buffing out a few dings and learning how to use the value they already have created and possess to their advantage.

For instance, most Liberal Arts majors or grads could greatly enhance their job market value and the buying temperature of prospective employers by simply and quickly adding a few skills which may range from basic tech or analytical skills to work facilitation and work environment skills  as well as the job search strategies, tactics and techniques that are needed to wrap around these core or foundational skill sets to land that coveted or desired job.

We've discussed this before but we can never do it enough:
1. Being good at doing the job is not the same as being good at getting a job.
2. It's not the degree you earned that's killing your job search.

What this means is that not all degrees are created equal in terms of the way they are perceived by prospective employers in particular and the job market in general.

This is not good or bad, it is just the way it is. And that's okay. Once we have tuned into reality, we can own it.

Specifically, the less value your degree is perceived to have in the job market or the lower the value that your degree signals or imputes to the job market (and/or the greater the supply of similar candidates in the job market holding the same credential) the greater your skill in understanding and applying the Job Search 4P's* must be.

Specifically, the Job Search 4P's are positioning, packaging, presenting and promoting skills as well as a candidate's ability to communicate and convey value (C&C) to a prospective employer.

Conversely, if you have a "stronger" degree (that is the perceived value of said degree is that stronger or more greatly valued in the job market) or employers clearly understand how to monetize (or have monetized) or they feel they can more readily monetize a particular degree (such as a  computer science or business degrees), all things being equal, you'll need far less proficiency in the application of the Job Search 4P's during your job search. 

Once you know what you're doing it becomes like shooting fish in a barrel.

If you have one of these higher in-demand, easier to map or more readily communicable  degrees and you know how to use the Job Search 4P's like a boss, well, in such a case, you'll quickly find yourself in such high demand that you'll basically lord over and rule the job market.

And that's a very enviable position to be in!

*Just to note, in this case, I use the term Job Search 4P's to describe a set of specialized job search skills as well as one overall job search process. If you are familiar with classical marketing literature there is also the Marketing 4P's which are Product, Place (distribution), Promotion and Price.
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It's Not The Degree You Earned That's Killing Your Job Search

1/25/2014

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By James Santagata
Principal Consultant, Career OverDrive!

One of the major challenges that new or recent graduates face in landing their first professional job is not necessarily determined by what they've studied but rather by what value they can offer to a prospective employer as well as their ability to clearly communicate and convey that to the prospective employer.

It's not just that some degrees are "better" than others, it's that some degrees are either far more in demand (due to a constrained supply) OR certain degrees are
more monetizable by the firm in question.

Holding an easily or readily monetizable degree means that prospective employers don't have to spend time figuring out how to use the degree nor does the student even need to be "good" at conveying their value (of course, this is still very important and I'm speaking on a "relative" basis here).

Conversely, if a degree is not easily or readily monetizable (or it's perceived that way) and/or there is a huge supply of those particular degrees in the marketplace, then the graduate (aka job applicant) needs to turn on or develop some strong "marketing and sales" chops to ensure that they have the proper messaging and are properly packaged and presented to the employer, while clearly communicating and conveying their value.

There's more to it than that on the marketing and sales front, but these are the broad strokes that you should be thinking about and internalizing.
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How To Do Favors, Earn Chips & Filter Out "Takers" & Manipulators

11/15/2013

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By James Santagata
Principal Consultant, Career OverDrive!

"I can't believe it's already 11:00 PM on a Friday night! This meeting was supposed to wrap up hours ago!", you say to yourself as you realize that the "simple favor" your co-worker had asked you to do for him (you know the one that  was supposed to start promptly at 6:00 PM with the client arriving at your offices and then end at 7:00 PM on the nose) has once again turned into a logistical, thankless headache with you trapped in the middle.

Worse, you've given up more of your own precious time and energy, burning yourself out and potentially putting your own personal and work relationships at risk with nothing to gain.

Have you experienced something like this before? If you have, you're not alone. If you haven't you surely will.

Within your current job and along you career path as well as within your private life, you'll have the need and occasion to help others as well as call upon others to help you. Depending on how you handle this, your stock will either rise in value or you''ll be used  as a step and fetch it (in the very worst sense of the word) and become a dumping ground for the work that others can't or just don't want to do. You can also expect your income to suffer, your job satisfaction and engagement to suffer and your career to suffer.  And worst of all, you can expect your work-life balance and health to suffer.
If you're observant, you'll quickly see these patterns emerging:
1. Some people are pure takers ("Takers") and never, ever give.

2. Some people are pure takers ("Takers") and will give but only when cornered, and even then they'll try to renege or slip out of reciprocity given any opportunity.

3. Some Takers routinely underestimate the frequency and value of what they take while at the same time overestimating the frequency and value of what they give.

4. If you're like most people, you're probably not communicating the value of your giving and the legitimacy of your own needs as well as the requirement that you fully expect the "chips" you've accumulated to be redeemed by the issuing party whenever you decide to cash them in.

Now, of course, no one wants to live in a purely quid pro quo world -- one in which you need to keep a running tally of everything you've ever given to others versus everything others have ever given to you.

On the other hand, no one wants to be taken advantage of or treated poorly.

Perhaps the most frustrating and painful situation occurs when you're aware of these patterns but just don't know how to act in a way that will enable you to reach your desired outcome while also not tarnishing your reputation or standing in the group.

Below I'll share with you a few simple but powerful techniques to test, reconfirm and further solidify your relationships with others both professionally and socially.

You'll also learn how to first signal and then train others in the manner by which you expect to be treated. Don't willingly be a step and fetch it or someone's door mat.

You may also remember that earlier we talked about developing situational awareness by pinging (sonar) and painting (radar) those around you.

Now we'll talk about how to do favors for others, set a value or impute value on those favors, collect chips for the favors you've done and most importantly, how and when to cash them in.  We'll also discuss how to identify and filter out "Takers" and manipulators and we'll do all of this in an  effortless and socially acceptable manner -- that is, in a manner that doesn't disrupt the harmony of the office or the group.

Obviously, much of this will be dependent on the LSD Principle of social relationships and interactions (this is a core principle of Psychological Jujutsu and is used and appears throughout all of my training) so you'll need to probe and map out relationships while learning to calibrate your responses and "challenges". But not to worry -- it's a lot easier than it sounds. Let's begin!
1. Don't be so easy, don't say "yes" to every request.
If you "give it up" on the first coffee date, whatever your true value (cosmically speaking) is, you'll find that it will suddenly be very much different from the value you have now signaled to the other party. And what matters most of all, is the signal that you have transmitted and the other party  has received. 

"He's easy. He just gives it right up..."

So don't just say "yes". Find out what they want and why. Gently push back or at the very least, "resist".

Consider the scenario, where a co-worker, Joe, wants your assistance.

Joe: "Can you do me a favor?"
Or he may be more specific "Can you do me a favor this Friday?"

Now, unless you have a very close relationship with that person, your spidey-sense should immediately get all tingly while you instinctively reply (verbally or written):

You: "What do you need?"
Or "I won't know until you tell me what you need..." 

You can and should still say this with a friendly tone of voice but you need to prevent jumping in with "sure" or "sure, what do you need?" because there are legions of manipulative if not downright dodgy people out there looking to take advantage of hardworking and honest people by shifting their work to others, and they do it by setting commitment and consistency traps.

Alternatively, you may hear:
Joe: "Hey, are you going to be around this Friday at 6:00 PM?"

You: "Why, what do you need?"
Or "What do you need help with?"

A truly dodgy person will then ignore your request for more info and simply continue:

Joe: "Look, I need to know. Can you do me a favor?"

You: "Not until you tell me what it is". 

Then posture away, shuffle papers, pick up phone to make a call, check your email or move away for a coffee and make a mental note: dodgy....hmm.

2. Once you've opened a dialogue you can press further. Resistance and challenges build value, filter out the "takers" and strengthen relationships with healthy people.

Joe: "Oh, I've got Mr. Kilkins from ABC, Inc. coming by at 6:00 PM this Friday and we need to give him a quick tour of our service bay and then a product demo right after that."

You: "You don't want to do it?"

Notice that although you've phrased this as question, psychologically you've framed it so that it appears that the other person is pushing the work that they don't want to do onto you. And maybe they are. Which could still be okay as long as get a chip of appropriate value and as long as that chip holds its value and is redeemable later for your own needs.

Joe: "I have XYZ to do"
Or "I have another meeting." 

Whatever they say, listen closely to what they say, what they don't say and how they say it. Next gently probe to find out if it's a real business commitment or a social "commitment" such as having drinks with his friends, going to a ball game, etc. 

After all, you deserve your own free time, too. And if you're giving up your free time to do someone else's work, you want to be certain that you then receive a chip of a certain value for your service and that said chip holds its value in the future and is accepted by party you previously serviced when you decide to cash it in.

3.  Build value further by signaling your own loss to do this and quickly explore other possibilities.

You: "Wow, that's short notice, I've got a lot on my plate..."
Or "Hmm, I need to be at XYZ place by  XX PM".... 

And then add this phrase right after that:
"....so can this push (meeting) out for another day?"

Watch the reaction. See how the person comes back.

Joe: "I wish it could but I was told it must happen on this Friday."

If you decide this isn't for you, then end now and move away but do it in a positive, helpful manner.

You: "I feel for you. Would love to help but I've got my own appointment at that time."

By using "appointment" you've made it clear it's stronger than a "commitment" and it's also hard to break, plus it's nebulous -- what is an "appointment"? Is it business or personal? A meeting or a haircut? Who knows. And that's the point.

Now step in and assist. "Hey, have you approached Linda over in marketing?"

And then let this die out.

On the other hand, see what Joe says, you may decide to help out and by now the price of the favor he is asking of you is going up in value. By the minute!

4. If you do want to do it, continue with this dance (which is actually a form of negotiation). Also be sure to now set hard time and effort limits for any help you render.

You: "Look, I'm extremely busy / it means I'll miss out on XYZ / it means I'll have to reschedule ABC, but if no one else can do it, I'll step in because I know you'd do it for me..."

Watch his reaction....

He should say, "Yes, I would!" or at least acknowledge your gesture and that he would. 

You can then confirm and prompt this by getting his public commitment.

You: "So do you need my help then?"

If he says "yes" proceed. 

If he refuses to say so publicly and commit to it, then simply bow out and move onto your own things as he is ducking out of a relationship. He's a user a worst, a taker at best. 

However, if he says "yes", then continue:

You: "I can do it, but I'm pressed for time and have a hard stop. He needs to be here no later than 6:00 PM AND I have a hard stop at 7:00 PM. No matter what. So I'm letting you know this up front and you need to let him know it."

Watch his reaction.

You: "I'll need you to send me a email about this and his contact details to me in case something happens."

If he fights that or says nothing will happen and so on, then just end it with:

You: "Look, I'm doing you a favor but it feels like pulling teeth..."

If he plays nicely and then sends you that email, reply with your requirements and terms:  

You agree to do A, B and C.
The guest / individual must be there no later than 6:00 PM.
Your hard stop is 7:00 PM, no extensions, no exceptions.
This is perfect because it protects you in several ways:
1. Many times, unsavory people will use the "camel's nose under the tent" technique to sucker you in, and then the next thing you know, the guest or customer arrives two hours late, wants a longer tour or requests other info that was not agreed to. Worse, you may even find that due to logistics, you are required or requested to chauffeur the person around town after the meeting -- all while the guy who was tasked with doing this is watching the ball game or kicking back drinking tequila shooters.  Which is all fine if it were your job, you agreed to it and you somehow benefited.

2. You have memorialized the events. This protects you from what you have offered to Joe (yes, unsavory people can pin anything on a sucker -- that's you -- and make it "their" problem, so this prevents you from assuming a situation of all risk and no return). It also gives you written proof of the agreement and your commitment. Make sure he replies to it with an "I agree" or "okay". Let him know if he doesn't reply (by replying to your exact email) that the deal is off. Do it in a nice, nonchalant, no skin off your nose manner. But just make sure you do it.

Once you have successfully performed this service, send Joe a short email talking about it and how it went. And be certain never to devalue yourself by using phrases such as "No problem"  or "It was nothing".

Your next step is to be certain to , as soon as possible, cash in part of those chips by asking Joe for a favor. Never wait too long because you need to find out immediately if Joe is a guy who honors the chips others have earned for servicing his needs or if he is a self-centered skeezer or Taker. 

This will let you now. Quickly. Painlessly.

And by the way, the more you do this, the simpler it becomes until you'll find that it runs on autopilot, in the background, that you no more think about to do this than you do when tying your shoes.
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Coaching, Communication & Talent Acquisition For Japan & Asia (Video Interview)

9/9/2013

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Asia Biz Blog's Howard Lim interviews James Santagata (Career OverDrive! / Silicon Edge / The High Impact Coaching Alliance) regarding Coaching, Communication and Talent Acquisition for Japan and Asia.

Full article:
http://asianbizblog.com/video-interview-3-tokyo-career-success-coach-james-santagata/
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    Career OverDrive™ is your platform for career acceleration and expert advice. Together we'll explore high-performance career development, acceleration, transitions and change, job searching, interviewing and salary negotiations, Psychological Jujutsu™ and office politics and organizational power dynamics.

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